Such Is Life


So tonight was one of those nights where I set myself up to fail. I was in my room and I changed into a warmer hoodie than the one I had on. This was bad enough being that it's almost April and it is still sweatshirt weather indoors. But what was i to do, this was a hoodie I had pined over for nearly 3 years and I finally hunkered down and bought it this Winter. I started moving all my Oregon (Pronounced: green and yellow) stuff home sometime my Junior year partly as a shift in my stylistic tastes and partly for posterity. I am less certain I will one day have a nuclear family all my own but still I just don't rock that much Oregon apparel when I don't have to. As i put it on it struck me that this would be the last time I'd wear this beloved hoodie of mine for quite some time because tomorrow the UPS lady is bringing me a Birthday present and I will be able to move this Yellow gem out of rotation for the near future.
Well as luck should have it, tonight was home made Yumm bowl night and as is my custom, I top off the Yumm bowls with a mix of Soy Sauce and Tapatio. The only issue tonight was that of the thrirty or so bottles, flagons, and other vessels present on my kitchen shelf the first one I pulled happened to be the single oldest bottle of Soy sauce I...ANYONE has ever seen. So I plucked this perilous pitcher from its perch and proceeded to pull open it's lid in order to pour it on my dinner...Disaster ensued. Ya'know, if I had been able to make it through just one more meal that hoodie would have gone into the closet in mint condition. Alas the ancient bottle was so old the soy sauce had begun to ferment and pressure had built up. When I lifted the top an explosion occurred instantly. I was sprayed in the face with soy sauce probably older than me and then the realization set in..my bright, incandescent, yellow sweatshirt was splattered with it. Worse things have happened.

The Culprits

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